• Deb Marlor

Show Yourself Some Grace


A key component of human consciousness that many of us need to address, and change is our tendency to be hard on ourselves. We do this in ways that are both overt and subtle, and a good part of the work is recognizing that we are doing it at all. For example, if we find it difficult to graciously accept compliments, this is probably a sign. Ways that we express this tendency include never feeling satisfied with a job well done, always wanting to be and do better, and getting mad at ourselves for getting sick, etc…Noticing that voice that is telling you can’t do something, that voice that is questioning your abilities. That voice that is mean, stating your too old, too fat, not smart enough that learned voice being unkind to ourselves.

In essence, when we are hard on ourselves, we send our bodies the message that we are not good enough. When we do this, we do damage. Either you continue in this manner or you address it. The truth is you have a choice about your thoughts! Living a life where we are being hard on ourselves is a waste of precious time and energy. To begin your course correction, you begin to “notice your thoughts”. What am I thinking? When you hear that voice stop, you have dominion over your thinking! Remember this: I have dominion over my thoughts and thinking. Now, replace or re-frame those negative, mean, constricted thoughts. I am enough, I did a great job on that project, I am good at my job.

I never really thought about the fact that I have a choice about those thoughts.

My Mentor, Mary Morrissey teaches us from the first day that I have a choice

about my thinking. I am grateful that there was a point in my life where I truly

heard this and realized, yes I do have a choice, and I am going to love and be

kind to myself. I challenge you to begin noticing your thoughts, remembering yes

I have a choice right now, to stop and re-frame it. Be kind and gracious to yourself, start with your thoughts. Next step, what can you do to show yourself that I love this body, mind, spirit? What can you do to be kind and gracious to this body, that miraculously operates and serves us 24 hours a day.


Written by: Deb Marlor




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